CorpComms Magazine

Several months ago, I received one of those cards from Royal Mail announcing that it had a package waiting for me that was just too large to fit in my letterbox. Not being my birthday or another celebratory occasion, I rushed to the sorting office to collect my unexpected gift.

It was a pack of six energy efficient light bulbs. On a scale of disappointment, with one being the 'most', I registered a minus ten. Several people in the queue could hardly contain their 'excitement' at such a thoughtful gift from our shared energy supplier; it's not often you hear the words 'twat' and 'light bulb' in the same sentence.

Don't get me wrong, I'm all for energy efficiency. I'm as concerned as the next man that polar bears are losing their habitat and, in some of my shoes, I swear you can actually see my carbon footprint.

But this was a flawed gesture. It was like junk mail, although it was not junk. Yet the bulbs did not fit a single socket in my small terraced house. They could not squeeze into any of my four chandeliers, two hanging pendant lamps, six table lamps or three ceilings pitted with embedded spotlights. I wanted to be good, I really did, but the bayonet fitting made it impossible.

I offered them to neighbours, only to find they were having the same problems, and my family. My mother took a few (to add to her stockpile) but the bulbs' long lasting quality probably means she has enough to see her out! Somebody suggested a donation to the charity shop. But I feel responsible for these bulbs now - I want to make sure they go to a good home.

But it's hard. The government has just revealed that about 200 million bulbs were sent out as part of the Carbon Emissions Reduction Target last year, or as many as eight per household. Up and down the country, people are facing my dilemma - struggling to find a use for their energy efficient light bulbs.

But at least there is one bright side. Months after its electorate could have told it so, the government has admitted that the policy was flawed. From January, no more energy saving light bulbs will be sent to unsuspecting people. Nobody new will share my pain. Yes, I have suffered - but at least it has not been in vain!

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